Aside from the clothing , “ freshness item , ” and fairly much every unmarried thing you’re able to legally – if shamefully – purchase on Cheshire Bridge , Atlantans actually do have a few guilty pleasures that we do n’t want the rest of the humans to hump about . If you encounter to be a soul that lives here , we ’re willing to bet that you , on the low , enjoy taking part in at least some of the enactment of moral turpitude listed below . But do n’t occupy : your secret ’s safe with us .
Biscuits
They ’re so bad for your consistency , but so good in your backtalk .
Trap music
Everyone – even Mayor Reed – has at one point request songs by Future and ‘ nem at marriage receptions , natal day party , Flywheel classes , whatever . If there ’s music playing , somone ’s request trap .
Attending art exhibits for the free wine
Wow , that ( sip ) painting sure enough is ( sip ) interesting . I feel so ( swig ) polite and so - phisticated ( gulping ) . Wait , how much ! ? ! ? As in thousands ? Damn . Must ’ve left my checkbook at base ! Can you give me two glass of wine this meter , bartender ?
Laughing at backed-up traffic when it doesn’t affect your side of the interstate
No matter how intemperately you assay , or how much you believe in karma , you ca n’t help but undulation at everybody stuck in a wall - to - wall backup just on the other side of the concrete partition of your preferable ATL roadway .
Feeling superior to people in other Southern cities
Nothing says “ Southern cordial reception ” quite like welcome your neighbors from Mississippi , Alabama , Florida , or South Carolina and telling them they live in hellhole food - desert cracker spook - townsfolk swamp . But they ’re always welcome to spend a nighttime with you . Onenight .
Gucci Mane
multitude who have no business organisation knowing who Gucci Mane is have joined the constantly go back “ Free Gucci ” campaign , and celebrate his album and prison house releases like they were in jail with him . Then they go back to workplace on Monday to analyse the data and put PowerPoint slides together .
Drinking immediately after church
Only God can judge you .
Bragging about the women-to-men ratio (if you’re a single man)
note it enough times to your single or marital out - of - townsfolk sidekick , and you might even take up believing your chances of dating someone super - attractive this twelvemonth are getting effective .
Pretending to be VIP
Everyone assure you acting like you ’re not hypothesize to be in this same demarcation as the rest of us . And we ’ll all ensure you see us smirking when you walk to the back of the pipeline , after the chucker-out inform you that your famous cousin-german must have draw a blank to put your name on the list . Unless you somehow play tricks them into getting in … in that cause … yo , thieve us up !
Telling everyone you live in Brookhaven
There is no brag humbler than lamenting just how much of your income is being spend on that tiny townhouse you ’re renting , and how you puzzle out so hard that you never get to expend time take the air around your dog - friendly neighborhood with your vegan Cavalier King Charles Spaniel , who is also named Brookhaven .
Starting a Southern food blog
As an Atlantan , you are the only # foodie in America qualified to stake smartphone photos of Chilean sea basso with topically forage wild mushroom medley and infant Komodo dragon foie gras .
Telling yourself a stripper was really into you
The center touch , the gentle shoulder rub , the conversation about Keynesian economics , the inadvertent brushing on your nose – it all just feel so existent , right ? Until you check out your bank account and realise that you just pay her rent for August .
Gentrifying ITP neighborhoods while pretending to be invisible
Just always outwear sunglasses , avoid turning your head towards the locals , and step with purposeful speed as you unload that Whole Foods bag and move quickly through the threshold of your Kirkwood two - sleeping accommodation .
Reminding everyone you’re not from Atlanta whenever Atlanta takes a collective L
Whether it ’s the internal embarrassment that came from newsworthiness reporting of the Snowpocalypse main road closure , or report card of just how much of a clusterf*ck Cobb County will be when SunTrust Park opens , there ’s one tried - and - true way to separate yourself , and it ’s phone … " Well , my home ’s earlier from Chicago … "
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Traffic in Atlanta|Flickr/Gregor Smith
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