We ’ve all been there – six to eight sequence deep into aTop Chef - athon , shoving stale nachos into your sass and staring blankly at Padma ’s hairsbreadth ( how does human hair even get that burnished ? ? ) , when the thought just pops into your forefront : Hey , I can do this !
detest to give out it to you , but no . Just nope . You ca n’t do that , because if you could , you would n’t be eating sloughy takeout and watch all that Hulu . You ’d beworking 13 - minute daysin some smelly kitchen . Even professional chef have a hard metre make it through Bravo ’s culinary gauntlet , almost all of them falling prey to at least one of these 17 guarantee pack - your - knives - and - go move .
Salty sins , fond sashimi , and undertake slaying ( aka , serving natural chicken ) are just a few of the evidence - story signs your preferent cheftestant is doom to face the metaphorical chopping block . Hold on to your toques , Thomas Kyd , we ’re in for a bumpy one .
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1. Making risotto
Risotto is one of those things that seems super slowly but is really , really difficult to get correct . A few seconds over and under and it ’s altogether ruin , either a mashed potato - like glue or tooth - cracking pickax - up - stick on a home plate . Basically , unless you grow up in the Italian countryside , stir up vats of the stuff and nonsense before you even had the teeth to eat it , just do n’t . You live who ’s amazing at make Italian rice ? Tom Colicchio , so much so that he was moved to twitch “ Risotto and top chef = fail ” while Season 11 was in full program mode . Only a fool tries to exhaust a master as his own secret plan .
2. Volunteering to captain Restaurant Wars
ForTop Chefaficionados , Restaurant Wars is like the 2d coming of Christmas . It ’s bound - of - your - seat amusement , a car wreck of explosive egos , fiddling , passive aggressiveness , and utmost , unadulterated discombobulation , all submerse into complete topsy-turvydom . And no matter who ’s at the helm , if that ship goes down , the maitre d’hotel ’s taking the blame . When season steady Kristen Kish signed up to go her RW squad , every single fan recoil into their Ben and Jerry ’s – the girl was a toast . And , lo and behold , Kish bring the capitulation for her squad ’s egregious mistakes – not because she made terrible intellectual nourishment , but because she could n’t treat being the chief . Even the Book of Judges were grim to see her go and the elimination round was one of the saddest inTop Chefhistory , on both sides . give thanks goodness she win back her spot on Last Chance Kitchen , dumb publicizing stratagem that it is , because her culinary natural endowment knows no boundary .
3. And/or agreeing to do FOH without FOH experience
The flipside to the police chief ’s perilous adventure is getting adhere with play emcee for the even . So many cheftestants treat this as a throw - away gig , inherently less important than sweating it out in the kitchen . But therein lie in their error – the diner , jurist ’ tabular array admit – only really see the front of house in legal action . It shape their entire experience , regardless of how perfect the crudo or lamb shank might be . There are a million ways to screw this one up , from spend all your meter expedite out back to running around like some sort of tuxedoed tweaker . Just enquire notorious pea plant puree thief Alex Reznik from Season 7 – sheik ’s vitriolic , demanding attitude , corny suit , and unspeakable awkwardness almost cost him the game . Also , Padma ’s cheek when he called that lamb chop a pork chop shot ? Worth a screenshot for sure .
4. Leaning on your presentation
Some judges appreciate esthetics more than others , but to deliver the goods the competition , a chef ’s intellectual nourishment has to taste good , bottom line . If somebody ’s top business organisation is prettify their plate , they ’re missing the spot . And if the street food - loving , famously bacillus - adverseTony Bourdainis on the judge ’s gore , that chef ’s in for a substantial lashing .
5. Sucking at dessert
show up without the slight bit of pastry dough knowledge is a massiveTop Chefno - no . commend Chef Marcel ’s fateful pork barrel - flavored ice pick on Season 2 ? Or Season 5 ’s Ariane Durate ’s acrid , Ne - yellow go at reach gamboge curd ? To this day , Ms. Lakshmi believe the monstrosity one of the worstTop Chefdishes ever , anticipate it , “ a nuclear disaster in a glass . ” It ’s not like you have to be a whiz at sugariness to ace the show , but not bulking up on a few round-eyed after - dinner delights is a full rookie move .
6. Under-seasoning your food
Say it with me : bland means high-risk . This has always been the case , fromRichie Blais’sad , sorry , Season 4 - stop scallops to Chef Jason ’s lackluster , elimination - worthy poached trout in Season 13 . Nobody wants to eat your sorry ass babe intellectual nourishment , particularly not a table of train professionals ( + Gail ) . With the exception of Season 11 - winner Nicholas Elmi , who blamed his reproducible under - flavouring on an “ extremely sensitive roof of the mouth ” ( OK , dude , serene down ) , under - seasoning your food sets you up for a one - way just the ticket to dumpsville .
7. Doing waaaay too much
Every single year , some cocksure Captain James Cook effort to make , say , salmon 10 ways , or a pasta that comprise every single minute aspect of his diverse heritage , or , like Dave Martin ’s time of year 1 finale fail , preparing three fair element instead of one impregnable one . As a principle of pollex , it ’s always better to Keep It Simple Stupid . belong too full-grown will only up your preparation time and increase your chances of assign out something puzzling and unfocused . If you ’ve catch the acquisition , what ’s the point of muddying them up with a bunch of nonsensicality ? Gail Simmons said it best : “ This is in reality way and food advice , but I call back hoi polloi desire to put too much on . It ’s important to realize that simplifying is always the way to go . ”
8. Screwing up the protein
appear , if countless hours spend glued to the tube teach me anything , it ’s thatcooking protein correctlyis paramount to success . If Colicchio tell , even for a choke s , that your heart or fish is undercooked , overcooked , too hot , too frigid , improperly slaughter , prepared in a way that makes does n’t make sense , or literally anything south of “ pretty secure , ” you ’re done for . Chef Tom ’s only spit out two bite during hisTCtenure , and they both involved warm fish . “ We were in the desert in Las Vegas , and it was about 110 degree . We were dish up more than room temperature raw fish , ” he told Bravo after - the - fact . “ Something about it just made that gag reflex go off . ” Whether you ’re working with shrink - wrapped chicken second joint or a $ 600 stinger of veal , that ish is the cornerstone of any meal , and check how to do it right is cook 101 .
9. Deviating from the challenge
This one ’s a truthful no - brainer , yet somehow it keeps on coming up , season after season . Everybody want to be Picasso , to put their own spin on the thing . That ’s all well and good – cookery is an art , after all – but do n’t roll so far that the actual assignment becomes a blur in the rear thought . A challenge is a challenge for a reason – there are rule , carefully designed rules mean to examine chef on finical skill , frame of creativity , and problem solving . If there were no rules , there would n’t be any competition , and then none of us would get to gaze at Padma week after calendar week .
10. Overselling or inaccurately selling a dish
Marketing rules everything , intellectual nourishment included . outdo up your peach too much and even professional polite world Eric Ripert might go about it with wary skepticism . Even worse , never call something avocado gazpacho and then hand Padma a bowl of pureed guacamole ( RIP Amar from Season 13 , it was a good running ) . You ’re never doing yourself a favour by stretching the accuracy .
11. Using too much – or too little – salt
Everyone throw down for a salt , but too much of a unspoiled thing is simply too much . Take Season 9 ’s Chef Chris Crary , for example , whose sodium - saturated juiceless - rubbed ribs send him flat down to Last Chance Kitchen . Meanwhile , over onAll - Stars , munchie originator Dale Talde almost lose his spot over an exceedingly dry and flavorless pasta and brussels pullulate conundrum . Mastering the middle ground between under - veteran and over - salted is key .
12. Even thinking about incorporating prepared, processed, or store-bought ingredients
Oh humankind , this one kills me . It ’s one affair to opt for some time - save dry pasta , but unless it ’s a mandate part of the challenge , see the frozen or canned commodity aisles completely off - limits . Just last season , loveable wunderkind Kwame Onwuachi met his maker when decided to center his pungency - sized chicken and waver fast - casual concept around some tiny Eggos . Like , really though ? Poor Kwame made his exit with Tom ’s concluding , damning words telephone in everyone ’s ear : “ If you had made your own , then we would have had something really unequaled . ”
13. Adding truffle oil
Top Chef ’s diverse and ever - evolving group of justice does n’t always agree on everything , except the mind thattruffle oil– especially the variety you may buy at Whole Foods without tout an intact squad ’s budget – is flat out disgusting . It does n’t make food taste soundly , it does n’t show any creativeness , it ’s more passé than a SnackWell ’s biscuit , and it ’s man-made , meretricious swill appropriate for place James Cook attempting to elevate their solid food . The goopy stuff even made Bourdain ’s most egregiousCrimes Against Food tilt , the account only state as , " It ’s not food for thought . It ’s not truffle . It ’s lube . "
14. Letting balance fall by the wayside
A great dish brings together multiple flavors and texture thoughtfully and harmoniously – and that , of course , goes doubly when you ’re compete forTop Chefstatus . DuringTop Chef : All - Stars , the hootie - hooing Carla Hall went down hard with a jazz group of a rubbery , undercooked deep-fried porc medallion and a mushy , cloyingly sweet apple - sweet potato mash . During dinner party , Gail lost her mind over a piece of “ rude pork ” while Monsieur Ripert quietly separate his down . It was a true mess of a plate , but sum up a little acid to neutralize the lucre , crisp up that pork , and sprinkle on a little crunch to even out the soupiness , and she just might have eked by .
15. Attempting to be someone you’re not
There ’s definitely merit in abuse out of your comfort geographical zone , sure , but just as writers must write what they get laid , cooks get ta cook what they cook … or something . think when Top Chef All - Star / Tammy - Taylor - look - alike Casey Thompson stress her manus at Chinese - elan crybaby feet ? It was a total incubus . At the judges ’ tabular array , Tom break so far as to call the sticky , sauce - covered talon “ uneatable . ” Love you , Case , but how ‘ bout we puzzle to New American from now on .
16. Or just doing the one thing you’re good at, over and over again
So many chefers come on set with a well - honed speciality – French classic , Pan - Asian cuisine , unused Italian pasta , Southern barbeque , molecular gastronomy ( severely , enough with the foam ) . That can be a huge asset for sure , but if you go around roll up the same gnocchi every damn competition ( ‘ sup Fabio ) , it wo n’t fly . It does n’t matter if it ’s as light and pillowy as a damn cloud , you ’re play yourself if you think it ’s going to win you gold .
17. Not tasting your food
This is a rasping one . There ’s never enough time , and often a chef will line up themselves scrambling to plate without having tasted every element in its last form . It ’s a crap shooting – if it pass to cultivate out , the judges will never know . But if they start rent a faulty dish to project and you admit that you did n’t even try it , you might has well bare off your chef ’s coating right then and there . advantageously to shut up and take the heat – nobody despises an excuse - touting stomach - acher quite like than Stone Cold Padma Lakshmi .
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