I ’m a car guy , and I do n’t just mean that cars are my job . Sure , I ’m favorable enough to labor and compose about them for a living , but it run profoundly than that : my total outlook on living revolves around the joy of driving . There ’s one type of vehicle , though , that ’s a complete and utter mystery to me : that rolling suburban monolith that everyone loves to hate , the flagellum of the route that is … the minivan .
To me , minivans have long be a sliding door - equip white flag of giving up to the pressures of parenthood . Butwhy ? Why choose the minivan when an sport utility can fit the kids AND the soccer equipment just as easily , and still work as an off - road toy on the weekends ?
It started off as sort of a challenge . " Make the motorcar guy repel a minivan ! ” they said . When Toyota send away a 2017 Sienna off on my doorstep , I thrill at the thought of driving it – and only it – for an entire week . But I did it . I go . And I learned a thing or two about what animation is like with a minivan .
Tara Miller
Turns out , other driver treat minivan like scraps .
In a minivan, nobody looks at you
I ’m no unknown to driving cheap cars on public roads , whether it ’s aquarter - million - dollar Rolls - Royce , or a pearl - dead aphrodisiac , garish - as - hellAlfa Romeo 4C. I ’ve also got agutted - out BMW 3 - serial caterpillar track toythat gets its fair part of care , but my daily number one wood plump largely unnoticed by the non - partisan . But really , it does n’t matter what variety of cable car you ’re in , you tend to appear at the other drivers around you , and they look at you , correct ?
That did n’t happen in the minivan . At all . I stand for , soak in that photo for a second . I force back around hold out my helmet and boxing glove and not a single person evennoticed .
In fact, they want to stay as far away from you as possible
And when theydidnotice me , it was because they seize I would hit them and wanted to avoid me as much as possible . I first notice this phenomenon while driving on a very flat , very full-strength stretch of road with a 40 miles per hour limit . Some number one wood – not all , but more than common – would moveover , giving me a wide of the mark berth than usual , as if I were an 18 - wheeler on the highway .
When I turned remaining , that ’s when peoplereallylost their jack . I was in the right - most of two left - turn lanes , and the red Mazda RX-8 on my left turn as sharply as potential , as if the gadget driver assumed that I , a menial minivan driver , would n’t respect the striped turn line .
The next forenoon I went for a drive during morning charge time of day – that ’s quality minivan time , correct ? This clip it was a middle - aged man in a Suburban next to me in the turn lane . He did n’t cut over to avoid me . alternatively , he just stayed back when the light change and waited for me to turn first . Seriously , he ’d rather piss people off behind him than sour by a minivan .
Tara Miller
People cut you off, and it sucks
If the all-embracing position was a funny quirk , people disregard me off was at good rude , at worst outright severe , and broadly get to . The first metre it happened was a red Jaguar F - TYPE R that look perfectly gorgeous and glimmered in the sun . Then derive the myriad saloon that merely could not wait the supererogatory three s to commit out behind me . I ’m not talking one or two here . It was as if there was a blink planetary house above me saying , " It ’s a minivan . It ’s going slow . " By day two , literally every time I arrive upon a cross street , my hand default to the horn , ground in case I needed it .
Do the great unwashed in Brobdingnagian truck and SUV experience this variety of inhumane treatment ? Well , I ’ve driven those too , and no , generally , they do not . People in minivan get branded as spoiled drivers because we assume they ’re distract by crying kids project their Happy Meal flirt around , but how much of that is really settle in truth ? aboveboard , the hard thing about motor a minivan was the world-wide disdain and lack of trust from my fellow drivers .
peradventure there was a silver lining to this minivan affair ? I decided to put the thing through its stride .
Aaron Miller
How does it drive? Pretty OK, actually.
Prior to this , I ’d only repel a minivan once before in my life … and that was on a track , in a prototype Toyota built specifically to leaven a point that minivan can be fun – and yes , it was an rank blast . Thisminivan , though ? I ’ll admit : it surprise me with its competency . With 266 horsepower and all - wheel drive , I ’d be willing to depend it would win its bonnie share ofraces against Hellenic American muscle car .
In normal traffic , it behaves , unsurprisingly , like a normal elevator car , albeit a fairly large one . You sit gamey enough – almost motortruck level – to find out what everybody else is doing in their cars . In dealings , that was probably the most fun scene of it .
Get out on the back roads , though , and that ’s where the surprises really kick in : it still feel like a normal railway car . The weakest nexus is actually the tire . The chassis is , believe it or not , alright when you get going to push its limit . I ’d say it ’s good , but I ’d have to include thefor a minivancaveat , which would block out the fact that it ’s not a sports car and simply does n’t aspire to be one . I found myself actively enjoying my time on the back roads , employ in a astonishingly bouncing dance with this moving company of mother .
Courtesy of Toyota
But does it rally?
I ’m not stupefied . I cognise this is n’t the vehicle to take if you want tocross the Mojave . Still , I require to know if it could deal something dim-witted , like a dirt or gravel road , with assuredness . The resolution ? Well , when you realize you ’re doing 50 miles per hour , off route , in a friggin ' minivan , you pretty much have to say yes , you know ? Considering its mission argument for hauling kids and crap around , the vehicle itself is a marvel .
OK, so it’s practical
I almost said it ’s like a modest truck , only in van form , before I realized the amentia of state that aminivanis like " a small van . " Seriously , though , I must admit it ’s truly a hardheaded vehicle . I took it for a cut to Home Depot and was able to load everything I needed in the back , and the fact that the rear and sides open on their own at the touch of a push button is a lawful help .
Also, it’s secretly a shaggin' wagon
In retrospect , this seems obvious . Toyota itself calls the Sienna the " Swagger Wagon , " which is clearly code for something its selling squad dares not say . you could , very easily , park somewhere sequestrate , hopefully with a good view , cast out in a movie ( I take the railway car - guy classicRonin , naturally ) , and root for out some popcorn . The back is more than spacious enough . Sneaking aside during those never - ending baseball game pattern for a little minivan alone time is something 30 - something parent might consider to spice things up .
You ’re in a minivan , remember?Nobodywill note you .
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Tara Miller
Aaron Miller/Thrillist
Aaron Miller/Thrillist
