Whether you ’re receive down and dirty at a proficient Western or high - rolling in the tack at a Hilton , there ’s something particularly red-hot about have sex at a hotel . But why limit yourself to the confines of your room ? You might be on vacation , but it ’s time to put your inside exhibitionist to work . Not sure which floor button to force ? We ’re here to avail . Here are the full plaza to bone at a hotel , as told by retiring and current hotel employees .
Bathroom break
Bathrooms are great gateway locale for riskier sexual destinations . Not only are they very secret , but you once you ’re finished , you’re able to fix your I - just - had - sex hair’s-breadth and pass over that lip rouge of your neck opening before stepping foot back in public . Pro tip : discover a unisex one if you may . We ca n’t name the hotel , but many NYC dwellers may know of a certain Downtown organization that has public convenience with trading floor - to - roof glass windowpane . And according to the faculty , these bathrooms have go steady their just share of action .
" People have gender in those bathrooms all the sentence ! " says one employee . " They ’re altogether see - through . [ Neighbors ] across the way can even see you pee-pee . We get complaints about it , but whatevs . "
Stairmaster
" stairwell , 100 % , " confides one former reservationist . As if taking the step in and of itself was n’t enough to get your heart pace move . While it might not be the most well-fixed , your safe bet is to do it standing on a corner landing place , equidistant from the door to the floor above and below you ( or so I ’ve heard ) . This gives you the most time to act innate in case someone show up . Keep in psyche , many stairwells are surveilled by camera . " You should see the bull the security measures guard would show me , " says our generator .
Going up?
arrest an lift in a interfering hotel for a quickie is a doubtful proposition at best , but people do it . " Drunkards would always pull the parking brake stop button , " recounts one former concierge . And unlike stairwells , elevator are much more likely to have tv camera in them . To decrease the likeliness of your moment winding up on the cyberspace , you might desire to try the Robert William Service elevator , explains another employee , since there " are n’t always cameras in there . "
Skinny dip
hop the pool and principal directly over to the raging tub . This tired cliché actually has a particular practical advantage : bubbles . They ’re like a blanket , but you recognize , not . bury your swimsuit ? strain the cabana . " We had a pool on the ceiling with cabana , " recalls one former hotel employee , " which were locate right where guests could have sexuality and not be [ seen ] by others around the pool . I ’m not talking an occasional affair , [ this was ] an almost casual happening . " That towel boy must ’ve had his work cut out for him .
Get on top
Of the roof , that is . Many hotels offer some kind of rooftop experience , whether it be a bar or a pool . This is actually good newsworthiness for you , since in the absence of a formal locus , you ’re likely to place off an warning equipment by trying to get to the ceiling . Find a still nook and check that to decorate for … ahem , easy access . We ca n’t think of a respectable way to enjoy the view . Traveling solo ? No job .
" There was a corner around the back [ of the bar ] where people would bed , " squeal one former employee of a in particular sceney Meatpacking hotel . " One of my coworkers would thieve up with girls while on his displacement [ there ] . "
Au naturel
If you ’re visiting a ardent - atmospheric condition name and address , why not make the most of the great outdoors ? You did n’t travel all this mode just to rest at heart . Plus , medal leave are like nature ’s very own " Do Not touch " mark . As one former bellboy recount , " The hotel [ I worked at ] was a haven for men and women to come have social function . There were bungalows with lots of greenery . Sex behind a tree was not rare . "
Anywhere but the bed
Still not sell on the idea of doing it anywhere but your elbow room ? All you play - it - dependable types may be wise to to reconsider . grant to our expert , hotel bed are basically petri dish for the sexcapade of Edgar Guest past .
In their hilarious tell - all , How May We Hate You ? , veteran concierges Anna Drezen and Todd Dakotah Briscoe explain : " We see people trip up through the third house all the time , distinctly headed for 11 solid minutes of warmth , and we squinch . We remember all the mass who did the same accurate thing on the same accurate layer the night before , and the dark before that , and on and on ad infinitum . "
So , if nothing else , at least remember to remove the continental quilt cover before you get down to business . That thing " has n’t been washed since before you could legally give consent , " write Drezen and Briscoe . Gross .
Jason Hoffman/Thrillist
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