Breakups are passing complex . Breakups due to chicane are even more complex – and breakups due to cheat that end in your partner leaving you for the soul they cheated with ? Most complex of all .

In the wake of theBrad Pitt and Angelina Jolie split , we ca n’t help but inquire what Jennifer Aniston must be thinking . Of course , we ca n’t blame her too much if she snickers just a little bit over this one . It ’s also catch us recalling all the complicated feels we had when our ex-wife trotted off withsomeone newfangled , only to have their hearts crease through the ember like ours were .

Regardless of theirreasons for cheating , that shithurts in literal waysthat are ridiculously difficult to come to grips with .   Here are all the thought we go through when an ex gets dumped by the mortal they left you for . Is n’t karma a beautiful cunt ?

Jennifer Aniston Brangelina Breakup

Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

I hope they find happiness… actually, no, never mind

Your ex was someone you once loved more than anyone in the universe . You need them to be happy because you know what a great person they can be when they are n’t being a cheating POS . You feel kind of sad for them . You know what it ’s like to injure and would n’t want that for them .

Yet , they are also a cheating , lying scumbag who left you for some hot newfangled piece of meat . And rest about it . So in that case , " FUCK YOU . "

I’m surprised, but not THAT surprised

I mean , you expect them to give away up since their house - of - cards relationship was based on lies . You suppose as much to all your buddy over that 4th round . But you are surprised . And , include it , relieve .

Because you were afraid that this relationship would be stronger than the one you had . And because some part of you hoped ( even a piddling bit , admit it ) that after everything some lie down , sniveling ex put you through , after all the heartbreak and pain , it would at least be for the actual affair . Eh –c’est la vie . What a waste .

Karma is a glorious, universal law

Karma is a sneaky lady and she always comes out on top . There is no leak ! So , while you have so much compassion for your ex and the heartache they ’re surely suffering through … allow ’s just say they had it coming .

Take that , Brangelina ! And screw you , Brad .

I’m still sour, but don’t really hate the person I was left for (as much)

At the end of the day , it was your cheating ex organize the deception and the leaving – not the somebody they leave you for . You might have once blamed this third political party for break up your kinship – but you ’ve come to bring in they have nothing to do with you . Your X is the bunghole .

Hey , you might even feel like thanking this other person for making your x feel as spoilt as you feel once upon a time .

I feel vindicated – and (thankfully) also pretty indifferent at this point

If my ex-wife allow me for another cleaning lady , I would be so devastated . I know I would have a really strong time acquire over it . But I WOULD get over it . I know I would get over it . And by the time those two asshats broke up , I ’d be way by all that drama .

Hell , Jen sure is . She just fete her one - twelvemonth day of remembrance with her husband , Justin Theroux , who is HOT . Do n’t believe me?Click here .

So , while you might finger pretty good about the fact that your ogre of an ex lastly got what they deserve , you ’re not exit to be that fired up about it because you ’ve moved on with your life . At this point , you ’re probably just feeling regretful for your ex . He or she is sound through a shitstorm of a divorcement and you ’re over here with your hot - ass husband living your best life .

At the end of the day , we can join together , united by the bail bond of sistership , and remember , with deep and profound tenderness , that both Brad and your ex look like tinker’s dam these days . You ’re the actual winner in this game of computed axial tomography and mouse .

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