Not everyone can pinpoint the exact moment everything changed , but I can : Outside Lands 2014 , more or less 11:15am on Saturday . I had just turned 27 and was at a brunch pre - game at a friend ’s place . My master of ceremonies was pulling a breakfast quiche out of the oven as her live - in swain tightened a knee brace around his leg ; a admirer was applying SPF 50 to anything not covered by a floppy sun lid ; others were stuffing superfluous sweaters into their backpacks . Another party - goer was pour down Advil – preventatively .
As I chased a multivitamin with water , I think to myself : “ This is it . It ’s all over for us . ”
1. A plan
There ’s a passel to do and see at Outside Lands , but do n’t make the rookie / early 20s error of spending all day on the hunt for a friend who has lost sense of blank and sentence in the Heineken Dome . ( Though , it is worth a spin around this igloo - like dancehall – especially if there ’s no stemma and it ’s chilly outside . ) define a merging place and pick your priorities instead of bleed from point to arrange – be an grownup and at leisure peruse the smaller stages , experiences , and interactional tents on the fringe of the main stages .
Check out the Gastro Stage – which copulate music and San Francisco ’s food for thought scene – to hang with a more mature bunch that ’s more interested in soaking in culture than pushing and shoving to the front .
2. Braces and athletic tape
Oh , you thought arch support and human knee braces were for marathon runner ? Well , I ask you , what is a marathon if not three days of festivaling ? My personal go - to is KT tape , which offers nice support and pain relief for my creaky knees , without appear bulky under jeans .
3.Dr. Scholl’s gel inserts
A pair of gels a day will run you $ 30 for the weekend , and it will be the good $ 30 you pass all year .
4. An outfit you can pop a squat in
Once you have to get raw in a orifice - potty , you ’ll never again prefer that cunning jumper over the more hardheaded mid - length skirt .
5.A shenis
“ What is a shenis ? ” you need . Um , only woman ’s greatest innovation since the tampon . There are slew of variations of what is essentially a funnel shape that allow women to pee stand up , but reviews notice that the pStyle help to direct the flow away from you and will not spill over . I did n’t have one of these in 2014 ( my only stumble ) , but I certainly wish I had as I crouched unfinished assed in the woods , attempting to time my squat with the dead dropping for maximum delicacy .
6. Tissue
Has there ever been sufficient amount of potty paper at any fete in the history of euphony ? The solution is no . You ’re almost 30 . Bring your own .
7. SPF 30 and above
By now you should know SF fog is not nature ’s sunblock , and anything under SPF 15 might as well be milk .
8. Layers
Scarves , sweaters , vests , shawl that threefold as blankets – you could never have enough in this schizoid climate . Of course , you never cerebrate you ’d be the case to tie a parka around your waist , but that ’s just the kind of reality mature adult come to terms with . Yes , you have become your parents , but your parents are not shivering down Fulton St.
9. Cash
10. Hand warmers
While some diehards might be unforced to give their good manus to see LCD Soundsystem live , we prefer to keep our extremities safe from hypothermia .
11. Drugs
You ’re a grown - ass individual with a job and a 401 kB – you do n’t grade drug in crowded places ; you secure them ahead of time and pack them alongside your vitamins and St. Joseph . And calm down , everyone . I ’m obviously spill about legal drugs that will make your time more pleasurable , like Zyrtec - D for your allergies and aesculapian marijuana for your inflammation and lower back pain .
12. Booze
By now you should be an expert at sneaking hard drink into Outside Lands , but if you ’re not here arefour style to do it . Not take down in that list are two of my best-loved methods : the baguet method acting , which regard stuffing a feeding bottle into Gallic scratch … and then use up said French bread with the nice triple cream brie you ’re patently also carrying with you . The second method acting expect wrapping mini inebriant bottles into a large , messy top bun , conveniently still somehow in trend . This works well if you are bless with voluminous mermaid hairsbreadth and do n’t mind feel like an undercover Chiquita banana tree .
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