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I incur high and watchedThe society of the Ringwith the Seattle Symphony and it was …
… pretty . Damn . Epic .
New Line Cinema
I know , the whole " You ever [ insert experience here ] while high ? It ’s sooooo much better " is such a banal figure of speech thatHalf Bakedmocked it nearly 20 years ago . But upon hearing that the Seattle Symphony orchestra was croak to screenThe Lord of the Rings : The Fellowship of the Ringwhile they played the entire scotch with a full chorus , I could n’t withstand the opportunity to go through one of the biggest fantasy epic poem in story , in surround speech sound , while rockin ' a head and body high .
So , arm with a couple of 15 mg peanut butter bar wedges , I settled in for the drive . Below is a timeline sum-up of my experience ordinate with the film ’s run time ( non - protracted edition ) .
deoxythymidine monophosphate - minus 30 minute : I finish dinner and come out myedibleso that it will recoil in right around when the movie starts .
T - subtraction 15 second : We Uber to Benaroya Hall and find our seats . The orchestra is plinking out quick - up promissory note and tuning their instrument . A congregation of singers go far , separated by sex and age ( ladies to the left , gentlemen to the right field , boys in front ) . I ’m jolly hyped .
0:00:20 – 0:01:03 : My homegirl Cate Blanchett begin her orifice voiceover . The chorus ’ soft voices mix with the strings play the film ’s iconic first notes , sending a quiver down my sticker . The costly ticket already feel worth it .
0:02:20 – 0:04:20 : The historic battle for the freedom of center - earth unfolds . French horns boom . The chorus chants . Sauron sends swell flying across the screen until Isildur gives him a four - finger - ectomy . wild because the ring really bind his outfit together , Sauron passion - quits and Middle - earth is safe … orisit ? ( It ’s not . We ’ve all seen this film . )
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0:04:35 : You hadonejob , Isildur . But noooo , he decides to keep the ring or else . Scumbag Isildur .
0:07:16 : First hobbit scenery . It ’s Flute Lady ’s sentence to gleam and she ace it . The orchestra win over me that Hobbiton is the happy , most shiver place on Middle - earth . In the immortal words of Liz Lemon , " I need to go to there . "
0:11:35 : Right when Gandalf knock on Bilbo ’s fleeceable hobbit threshold , I realise the edible has kicked in . My face tingles and my body melts into my seat , figuratively gluing me in place . odoriferous .
0:13:30 : Gandalf and Bilbo cryptically discuss the 111 - yr - old hobbit ’s natal day plans while a rare muteness settles across the orchestra . I realize there is so much music in this pic that the absence of it during a springy performance is jarring .
0:15:13:“Old Toby . The finest weed in the Southfarthing . " The consultation express mirth and it dawns on me that there ’s a reason why Hobbiton is the happiest place on Earth , and why hobbits always seem to have themunchies . # legalizeit
Bilbo blows a hummer ring . Gandalf one - ups him by bumble a friggin ' three - sail sess ship that sails through it . Showoff .
0:15:39 – 0:20:00 : Ain’t no party like a Hobbiton party cuz a Hobbiton party do n’t stop ! Then Bilbo disappear , Frodo ’s all " WTF , " and the adventure begins .
0:26:42 – 0:27:19 : horn blare as Gollum undergo " enhanced inquiry tactics " in Guantanamordor Bay . " shire horse ! Bagginsssss ! " The Nazgul ride out while I experience the chorus ' sing - chant reverberate through my body .
0:30:50 – 0:36:26 : surprisal ! You just inherit a cursed ring . Get thee to the Inn of the Prancing Pony and await further instruction . And take cheep Sam with you while Gandalf convenes with Saruman , the head of his order who " is both wise and herculean . " I think ofSouth Park ’s " Garden of Lies " scene and muttering to myself , " He ’s gon na betray you ! "
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0:39:20 – 0:43:05 : Saruman ( RIP Christopher Lee ! ) chides Gandalf for not knowing the One True Ring was in the Shire this whole sentence , saying , " Your lovemaking of the halflings ' foliage has clearly slowed your mind . " " Yeah , well , you get it on that ’s just , like , uh , your opinion , valet . " He then pulls a Kevin Durant and is all , " Look , the Golden State Warriors Mordor has all the talent and power so I ’d be a soft touch not to sign with them , " while the Oklahoma City Thunder Gandalf replies , " gravely , dude ? " The orchestra ’s ominous undercurrent build to a crescendo . struggle of the Beards ensues .
0:44:35 : Frodo and Sam literally run into Merry and Pippin . The quartet tumbles down a ravine . Pip narrowly avoid getting a fount full of poop , which actuate laughter from the consultation and a loud , accidental fart from the balcony neighbour sitting to my right hand . I grapple to keep it together until my husband leans in and whispers , " Did that guy cable just laugh - booze-up ? " I pass the next several minutes shaking with silent laughter while hot tear swarm down my face . As Louis C.K. so attractively put it , " You do n’t have to be smart to express mirth at breaking wind , but you ’d have to be dazed not to . "
1:01:15 – 1:04:55 : With " Strider " in tow , the dumbass hobbits light a flack and thereby draw the tending of the Nazgul . string screech , motor horn belch , mass tone . I watch , mouth agape love . Frodo gets the world ’s foul staphylococci infection from a Morgul blade and Strider ’s all , " We postulate to get his As to Rivendell so we can treat this with some universal health care cuz I do n’t have the schmeckles to pay for this . "
1:04:56 – 1:07:26 : The flourishing Gallic horn indicate we ’re back in Isengard watching the orcs grade up . A butterfly appears and the score ’s aggressive 5/4 prison term transitions to a celestial choir sound . One of the boy stands up to solo while Gandalf whisper , " Get me the eff out of here " to the butterfly , and his flawless voice sate the philharmonic hall .
The beautiful tattle is promptly cut short by Saruman watching the terra firma survive - nascence a gang of to the full grown Uruk - hai extend in slime . Gross . direction to vote out the second .
1:08:30 – 1:13:42 : Arwen to the delivery ! She uses herMario Kartgolden mushroom boost to speed her and Frodo to Rivendell after discharge the Nazgul with a real rendition of " Wild Horses " ( I pretend they could drag you away , after all ) .
1:24:54 – 1:26:32 : Arwen and Strider share a moment on a bridge deck , go over their Facebook Memories ( " Here ’s us at Bonnaroo ! Here ’s one of us naught - lining ! " ) . While they reminisce , a vocaliser , fend out in a pretty pink nightie among the chorus and musician ' conservative pitch-black attire , performs the " Theme for Aragorn and Arwen , " her voice ebb away and flowing like a gorgeous , ethereal ambition . Arwen give Strider the elfin equivalent to a promise ring and he ’s like , " Uhhhh , are n’t you immortal or something ? This is Middle - earth , I ’m going to survive to 45 tops . "
1:28:13 : Legolas outs Strider as Aragorn , son of Arathorn , and Boromir ’s all " Oh crap , I ’ve been throwing shade at my friggin ' world-beater this whole time ? ! "
1:30:00 : Boromir utters the line , " One does not only walk into Mordor " and the group to my rightfulness ( which possibly include Laugh - Tooter ) come out cracking up . I ’m unconnected until I call back the net meme . Methinks my neighbors may be stone , too .
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1:32:20:“And my axe ! " My neighbors laugh some more . I require to lie with whichstrainthey pre - funked with .
1:33:30 : We make it to suspension . The crowd applaud the orchestra and the chorus . My married man and I make our own intimidating journeying to the bathroom , our legs as enceinte as the One Ring . The edible is still go strong so I make up one’s mind not to re - up with another half - wedge .
1:34:39 : One of the French - horn performer stretch out his cervix to determine Bilbo ’s face turn evil as he strain for the ring . It ’s the good face - alteration jump scare since Large Marge , and the audience gasp in jittery delight .
1:45:43 – 1:47:45 : Gimli ’s all " Get hype , dudes , because my boy Balin throw the most heroic house party in Middle - ground . " Unfortunately , he block to text his cousin ahead of time and the Fellowship realizes they ’re about seven twelvemonth too late to the shindig . Also , everyone ’s dead , which is too unsound because the gang bring a huge plate of calamari that ’s completely going to go to wastefulness because seafood does n’t salve well .
1:49:26 : Frodo goes full Rockwell and Gandalf ’s like " Oh yeah , that Gollum is a degree - five clinger . Just ignore him for now , as he wo n’t actually get any screen metre until part two . "
1:52:50 – 2:01:47 : Gimli discovers his cousin partied a little too intemperately , Pippin does derisory Thing # 578 and bidding a clump of orcs tow a cave round , and an larger-than-life mini - battle ensues . Once again , the orchestra falls silent for much of the combat , letting the vivid action verbalize for itself until the cave troll goes on a rampage and stabs Frodo . ( Do n’t worry , mithril armour spares our hobbit submarine sandwich . )
2:01:48 : Cymbals crash and rousing horn blare " The Bridge of Khazad Dum " as the Fellowship tries to nope their way out of Moria .
2:07:45 : regrettably , a Balrog appears and is all " Can I come too ? " and Gandalf pulls a mean nipper fromForrest Gump , sneer , " This seat ’s taken ! " So rude .
2:13:17 – 2:17:52 : The crew sans Gandalf draw it to Lothlórien and meets Lady Galadriel . pinkish Gown Singer do " Lament for Gandalf " while the female Greek chorus members sing mournfully in the background . It ’s a stunning performance .
dogsrule3444/Youtube
2:18:00 – 2:23:20 : The chorus line is really nailing the moony feel of the elf forest , underline Galadriel ’s midnight stroll ( is she on Ambien ? ) with fantastical timbre . Frodo tries to give her the ring and she ’s like " Thanks , but white gold go well with my complexion . By the way , someone in your work party is gon na adjudicate and jack yo ' jewellery . "
2:25:00 – 2:35:10 : The Fellowship exit Lothlórien with gifts in tow ( Boromir : " Awww , I got socks " ) , but unbeknown to them the Uruk - hai are hot on their trail . Boromir gets grabby , Frodo bail , and the rest of the bunch prepares to take down an entire orc army . Oh mankind , this last scene is SO FREAKING GOOD .
2:35:11 - - 2:37:10 : The orchestra members who are n’t performing sneak peeks at the filmdom to keep an eye on the epic mini - battle . I ’m hugging my stifle to my dresser as Aragorn , Gimli , and Legolas kick ass and chew bubble gum tree ( and they ’re all out of house of cards gum ) . The euphony sailplane and I feel like I ’m right next to Frodo scrunch behind a tree and peeing myself in awed little terror .
2:37:38 – 2:44:22 : Boromir redeems himself and goes out like a boss , contain down about 15 - 20 orcs while getting shoot down by arrow the size of it of tree branches . Aragorn dispatches the Uruk - hai with the Snooki hairsbreadth bump and we all learn Sean Bean die on filmdom for the 20th fourth dimension .
2:44:24 – 2:58:20 : Sam and Frodo continue on towards Mount Doom while Legolas and Gimli juncture Aragorn in hunt down the orcs who hobbit - napped Merry and Pip ( after they quit at a dispensary , since we know our homo Viggo partakes in cannabis ) . Pink Gown sings Enya ’s " May It Be . " She ’s followed by another solo from the son treble as the orchestra plays through the entire death reference chronological sequence , and I ’m moved to tears by their faultless performance .
The bunch cave in a waken stand standing ovation to the soloists , the orchestra , the Greek chorus , Peter Jackson , everyone in New Zealand , Tolkien ’s ghost , and George R.R. Martin for some reason .
My husband and I snaffle an Uber dwelling house and vape someBlueberry Cheesecake , alternately awe over how amazing the screening was and laugh once again at Laugh - Tooter . We brainstorm other epic film we ’d eff to see the Seattle Symphony orchestra perform to before calling it a night , ourdreamsfilled with diminutive hero , iconic music , and surprise flatulence .
This clause was originally publish as " I catch High and Watched The Fellowship of the Ring with the Seattle Symphony and It Was … " For this and more articles on cannabis news and culture , visitLeafly News .
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