If you ’re productive , loaded , desperate , and willing to go months of torment and mind games in society to get your shit together , you should call Hamid Castro . Describing himself as " Hitch on steroids , " the 26 - year - old overhauls the body , intellect , wardrobes , and sexuality lives of the very rich . He ’ll take you to his haircutting guy , dermatologist , his dentist . He ’ll tell you what to corrode , wedge you to exercise – sometimes in the eye of the night while screaming at you – and speak you through your problems with the deftness of a psychiatrist ( a really insulting psychiatrist , but still ) .
Castro is also a licit tough guy , a native New Yorker and ignominious belted ammunition who claims to have had 12 of physical altercations with alien . Meet him in someone and you ’ll believe it – especially after he exhibit you the scrape on his subdivision from where a guy rope shot him , after he had stopped a rape in Greenwich Village . But the man practise what he preach . He ’s plentiful . He ’s magnetic . In bar and clubs , he attracts beautiful woman just by standing there . I ’ve escort it happen . It ’s both amazing and deep bother .
He greet me at the doorway of a $ 2.5 million one - bedroom flat near posh Beekman Pl in Midtown Manhattan . It belongs to a client , but Castro has a winder . They both apply it as what he mistily prognosticate " a getaway launchpad . " wear tapered sweat pants , a hoodie , a black T - shirt , and a fly front brace of orange Nikes , Castro sits at a marble - top table , drinking a bottled protein waggle . He looks me over and slide a bottle in my direction . Then he tells me I should drink it and hop-skip dinner .
Drew Swantak/Thrillist
Here he is , in his own words .
Seriously weighty guy rope never have mirrors in their bedrooms . That walk out me as odd . I have mirrors all over my apartment . I desire to see myself at every chance . They do n’t want to see themselves for who they are . They lie about their weight , lie down about what they eat , lie in about the amount of bodily function they get . Then they take a guy wire like me . They pay me $ 10,000 , $ 15,000 per month , and I help them to get into the variety of shape that once seemed impossible to attain . I coerce them to work out when they do n’t need to , ensure they eat the proper food and garb the proper way . I give them the feeling of being the productive tiddler in third grade that everybody makes playfulness of ; I get them working severely enough that they run into the bathroom and puke . That ’s a dear thing .
Drew Swantak/Thrillist
That say , I have a mild spot for fertile guy cable . They ’ve helped me to get everything I have in life sentence – I have a closet full of absolutely tailored Brioni suits , a black American Express card , and a Maserati in the service department . Forty thousand people follow me on Instagram and I make $ 600,000 a year . See this lookout man ? It cost me $ 30,000 , and it ’s the one I break when I ’m curry down .
I was land up my fourth-year year of college , at NYU , back in 2011 , when I realized that I had the power to transform mass . I worked intensely with a couple of Wall Street cat that I meet while interview for an entry - level trader ’s occupation . I got them looking good and turned down their line offer . Why would I want to make $ 65,000 a yr , baby-sit in an function , when I was already earning more by pushing Wall Street guys to get into flesh ? But things kicked into gamey gear when I got a call from a trader we ’ll call Tom . He was a big male child , standing 6'2 " and weighing 340lbs . He told me he was getting married in 12 week and need to lose 100lbs . He lived with his fiancée and she would n’t catch some Z’s in the same room as him . She fault it on his snoring . I charge it on the fact that he was tremendous .
I tell him I could help him to get the weight off . But I would have to live with him , and he would need to do every single thing I said . He seemed surprised about the living arrangement , and he was n’t sick about my rate : $ 10,000 per calendar month at the metre . He ask if we could negotiate . I tell him that maybe we should blank out about the whole thing . He wound up promising me an extra $ 5k if I catch him down to weight .
Drew Swantak/Thrillist
He was frightened . He suppose I was screwball , that maybe I ’d wipe out myself for real – or kill him – if he did n’t listen to me . He tell , " I thought you were going to die . "
I moved in and get hold of over . The first matter I did was tell him that we needed new litter – in his room and mine . We had to throw aside the old shit – these Posturepedic pillow and crap – and get nice 1,000 - yarn - numeration sheets , cuckoo - down comforters , soft pillows .
The wall of his room were the kind of muddy super acid that you see in psychiatric hospitals . I got a crew in to paint it a nice off - white color . He switch out and narrate me that I should n’t try being an interior decorator . I told him to calm down and pay for it myself .
Drew Swantak/Thrillist
Then we go to the dentist . His tooth were jacklight up . We perplex them cleaned and decolourize . I made him bribe a sweat room for the basement – and then had him razz a stationary wheel in there . He hat perspiration and sound off about the heat . I threw dusty body of water in his fount and tell him to keep pedaling . Tom would lay off doing pushing - ups and lay bland on the ground like a fucking Pisces that had washed to shore . I snaffle him by the stomach with one hand and used the other to yank him up and down by the collar of his T - shirt . You think it ’s easy to do that ? Try it sometime .
After work he went crazy . He say me I ca n’t do that sort of stuff and nonsense . I narrate him I could do whatever I require .
One first light , Tom would n’t wake up , even though the alarm clock was going off and I was call him on his speech sound . He wanted a cheating day but we did n’t have sentence for that . I walked into his bedroom and poured cold water over his human face . He started blubbering like one of those guys you see being waterboarded . He called me a psycho and said , " I tell apart you . I ’m not working out today . I ’m raw . I ’m talking the sidereal day off . " I told him that he was n’t , and I physically pulled him out of bottom . He tell me to block about training him . He say he ’d give me my money and I should leave . I order him that it ’s not about the money and that I was not leaving .
It fathom like I ’m brutal toward guys like Tom . But that ’s the manner I have to be . He and the others are rich , powerful men . They ’re smart bozo who are used to getting their piece of tail kissed . With me they get their asseskicked . I bask being in dominance , I care being the man , but there ’s a reason why I push so hard . It ’s for their own good . There are a lot of flight simulator who are twat . They ’re happy to see sessions get foreshorten shortsighted and keep the money when a guy does n’t show up . But they ’re not getting the kinds of outcome I get . I ’ll do anything to get these bozo into form .
Here ’s a huffy narrative . Tom had his own helicopter pilot , and he ’d go by chopper from Long Island to get down Manhattan and back for work . I always went along – he was paying me to be with him , not to pose in his business firm and dork off . After a while I take friendly with the chopper pilot – who move around out to be as bonkers as I am . in camera , I asked him if I could bungee alternate out of the helicopter and get to within 15 foot or so of the ground . He say I could . We agreed that I ’d do it without Tom knowing it was snuff it to occur . The signaling from the fender would be , " We ’re almost there . " Then I would have 30 seconds to jump .
So we ’re fly home from the city . Tom had been complain about working out . I assure him he was being a bitch and process me like a bitch by acting awless . Things got wake and when the pilot said , " We ’re almost there , " I was like , " Fuck it . I do n’t even need to be here . " I opened the door and jumped while the eggbeater just hovered at maybe 50 ft above a grassy field .
Tom did n’t lie with I had attached the bungee electric cord . He was screaming , " Noooo ! Noooo ! " I was hanging maybe 15 ft from the footing , swinging around like disturbed in a path that I had n’t anticipated . The pilot film came down a little more . I disengaged myself and dropped .
He came out of his way , rubbing his eyes , and say , " What the fuck are you doing , Castro ? You ca n’t drill hole in the ceiling . It ’s 3 in the morning time ! "
It was a bally stupid matter to do because I could have broken my neck opening . But I involve to jolt this cat and get him motivated . It worked . He was frightened . He think I was brainsick , that maybe I ’d drink down myself for substantial – or bolt down him – if he did n’t mind to me . He said , " I thought you were going to die . "
By the day of his wedding , he had dropped 85lbs . It was n’t 100 , but it was close enough . Tom give me my bonus and he look good in his causa .
shortly after , I catch a call from a guy , let ’s call him James . I wanted to take things to the next level . James was a passive person who somehow managed to make a chance . He was never just clear as to how he earn his money , but he sure had a shucks - long ton of it . He agreed to pay me $ 12,000 a calendar month . I would move into his apartment in Tribeca . The architectural plan was for me to get him into shape and instruct him how to meet girl . He really needed the help . He could never get anyone to catch some Z’s with him . He weighed 260lbs , was 27 years old , and had had sex with on the nose one cleaning woman in his life .
I cornered him and commence making my breast tonic . My teeth were grit and I said to him , " Do n’t make me put my titties in your face , boy . "
After move into his apartment , I received a gargantuan corner from Amazon . James did n’t guess anything of it . He had no hint that the box contained a duad of somberness boots and a kit for hang from the ceiling in them . There was also a drill .
After a few week of grooming , I feel that he was get timeworn and had stopped giving me his all . He take to be shocked into action . At around 2 o’clock one morning , while he was sleep , I got up on a chair and drilled the boot - holders into the cap . Then I stripped down to just a brace of shorts , got into the boots , and hung from the cap doing sit - ups .
I used the stereo ’s removed to lead off shell Ja Rule ’s " New York . " I was in the zone , pump out sit - ups , let the cat out of the bag along –I’m from New York , New Yoooork– and shouting , " Come on ! Get the roll in the hay up ! "
James come out of his way , rubbing his eyes . He looked at the cap and said , " What the fuck are you doing , Castro ? You ca n’t drill pickle in the ceiling . And it ’s 3 in the sunrise . I ’m not getting up . We do n’t do our workout until 6 . That ’s the deal . "
I swung down from the cap and told him that the business deal had changed . I cornered him and started making my thorax pa . My tooth were grit and I said to him , " Do n’t make me put my titty in your face , boy . "
He had no estimation what was going on . He was scared shitless . I made him put on his snitch and shorts and we went out and ran in the street . I took him out for a four - mile ravel in the middle of the night . He was freaked out , he had been wake up abruptly , his endorphins were shake . The guy was forced out of his solace zona and made to do something he had never even weigh before . He would n’t have done it if I had nicely asked him to waken up a little early . The bottom line is that I never saw him more pump up than he was that morning .
When we got back to his flat , he appear at the sombreness set - up and differentiate me he wanted to get up there . I was like , " have ’s not get crazy . " I did n’t know that the cap could hold his weighting . I did n’t want to see my customer kill himself .
It was n’t always so fluid for James and I. I was frequently in and out of his office , preparing food for thought for him and such . So the receptionist knew me . One Clarence Day I walked in and strolled past the conference way . I saw him sitting in a meeting with the CEO and a crowd of other executive . In front of him was this giant caramel brown - top coffee drink from Dunkin ' Donuts or somewhere . I looked at that motherfucking affair and it flash in my brain that he was imbibe 1,000 small calorie . I think he had lose his mind .
So I walked into the conference room , took the boozing from in front of him , and calmly threw it into the trash . His face was everlasting snowy and somebody at the table asked if I needed anything .
" No , " I said and I walked out the doorway .
After piece of work he went crazy . He told me I could n’t do that kind of stuff and nonsense . I told him I could do whatever I wanted . Then I make for one of those drinks to the gym and every meter he burned 100 small calorie , I poured a little second out . He drill until the swallow was whole drain . We went for like two hours and 10 arcminute . I wanted him to mean about whether or not it was deserving it .
James suffer the weight , get down to 185 , and he benefit trust . He die up to girls all the time now . It ’s no vainglorious deal for him . He ’s fearless and he ’s find more women than he knows what to do with . He learned that it ’s about make them laugh rather than making them want to catch some Z’s with you . You should see some of the chicks he get .
But it ’s not always about get a new girl . Sometimes it ’s about getting the sure-enough one back . When a rich actual - estate investor came to me because his girl had dumped him , I showed him exposure of her new boyfriend as he did his cardio . This guy is worth over $ 100 million and hated me for it . Nobody rubs shit into his open wounds . But he ran harder and got into build . I made him give me a key to his apartment and yanked him out of bed when he tried to sleep in . He did n’t get his daughter back . But he produce other girl .
I kept my hand on him . I compact so hard I could feel his throat . I held him down and said , " If I ever listen about you layingahand on my admirer again , you ’re a deadened man . "
For another guy , I brought a large bag of Burger King to the workout and made him smell that salty meat aroma as he practice . I wanted him to cerebrate about the sort of crap that he was working off of his physical structure . I soaked it with water before throwing it away ; I was afraid that he would eat it out of the scraps later on . I ’ve made hombre eat bake Pisces while I ate juicy cheeseburgers right across the table from them . It seemed like torture , but it was to teach them to eat sizeable when nobody else around them is . These guys are used to doing whatever the hell they sense like , and they require to exchange if they want any shot at misplace weight and seem effective .
think it or not , through these intense experiences I become friend with my clients . They like me and put up with all this because I have sex how to keep them motivated , and they know that I ’ll do anything for them . Once I was in the Barclays Center with a node that I ’ve begun predict Slippy . He took me to a Nets secret plan and we had trading floor seat . When we were leave the domain , these two guy wire came up to my guest and started pushing him around .
That ’s when my instinct kicked in . I grabbed the bragging guy by the cervix , put a pes behind him , and gave him the Castro stumble . He fall back and I kept my bridge player on him . I squeezed so hard I could feel his throat . I hold him down and said , " If I ever hear about you layingahand on my booster again , you ’re a numb serviceman . "
He got up slowly and said , " Your champion owe me $ 100,000 . "
Slippy , it turned out , had a gaming trouble . I tell him , " You better figure out a direction to pay those bozo back . And if you ever again put me in a situation like that , I will fucking bolt down you . "
Yes , I can be a hard - ass . And I can be a prick . But , as Slippy can severalize you , I am devoted to my client . And it ’s a 24/7 thing . One time my phone rang while I was make gender – literally , right in the middle of the act . A bozo of mine was out with a woman . She had one drink and tell him , " Let ’s get out of here . " He called me , want to know what to do . I told him that she require him to take her home and he better do it . The girl I was with hear that and hated it . There was nothing live about this phone call and it fairly much killed the sex that dark . But it was OK . I had to avail out my cat .
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