Let ’s admit it . We all love Spotify play list , but their actual contents do n’t always add up with what the hello - res filtered art and vague description would have you believe . Who can say for certain what really awaits me on the other side of " Running Thru a Field of Smiles " and " Lush Life " ? Let ’s call a spade a spade , Spotify .
Songs to Sing in the Shower:
Songs to Drive My Roommate Out of the Apartment
Your Favorite Coffee House Mix:
My Favorite Public Place to dissemble is My animation Room Mix
Morning Commute:
A Playlist for the Full Hour I ’ll Be Sitting Next to That Guy Whose Cologne reek Like Balsamic Vinaigrette
The Ultimate Indie Playlist:
Soundtrack to My Whimsical , Quirky Life as an Unpaid Intern
Soak Up the Sun
Summertime Classics I Would Really love If I Were n’t So disturbed About That Weird Mole on My Thigh
Young, Wild and Free:
My parent Pay for my Spotify Premium Account , My Rent , and Literally Everything Else
At Work:
My Earthly Vessel May Be immobilise in a Windowless , Fluorescent Hellscape but My Soul is Still Pantsless at My Apartment Listening to These Songs
Power Workout:
Pump Up Jams for carry Groceries Up to My Sixth Floor Walk - Up
Breakup Songs:
I Have fearful News for You and I ’ll Tell You What in good order After This 30 Second Ad for Sam Adams Summer Ale Ends and The Cure Starts Playing
For Those About to Rock:
For Those About to attempt to Relate to Their stripling … Good fortune
Songs for Coping with Loss:
birdcall for Coping with the Loss of My Debit plug-in , My Mailbox Key , and My Bike , Which I Tipsily lock up Somewhere Two Weeks Ago
All the Feels:
I Just Double Texted and Now I Totally Get What Joan Didion go Through
The Writer’s Playlist:
I Spent All twenty-four hours save a Bad Review for My Uber Driver Who Would n’t Let Me DJ My Trip with These Song
On Fleek:
My Grandson Sent This Playlist to Me and I go for “ On Fleek ” Does n’t entail Something Racist or Weird
Soul Coffee:
May These tune Soothe My somebody While I Am Stuck in the Bathroom Because the Hot Barista secern Me to adjudicate the Coldbrew
Living in My Headphones:
Going to Turn This Up rattling Loud So I Ca n’t Hear valet Shouting at Me to Smile as I Walk Down the Street Because I Am a Woman and This is the Way the World Is
Atmospheric Acoustic:
Not Sure If You Heard Me Reply “ No Fucking style ” When You call for If I Wanted to Hear Your Acoustic Cover of ‘ Hotline Bling ’
Walk In Like You Own the Place:
This is What Was Playing at That Very Cool Bar When I cut down My headphone Into the Toilet
Top Party Jams:
Songs I Put on to count “ With It ” When I ’d Rather Be Listening to Yanni on a Windy Moor
Sleep Sounds: Waterscapes
White Noise to Drown Out the Sounds of Police Sirens , Honking Trucks , and nightlong Construction Work Because I Live Right Next to the Brooklyn - Queens Expressway Because This Is the Only Studio Apartment I Can Afford
Screenshots via Spotify / Oren Aks / Thrillist
