The day before I was arrested on felony drug self-will charges , I sell my plasma . I regretted that choice later , when I was book at St. Landry Parish Jail . After I donned an orange jumpsuit , unbraided my hair , and scraped the glitter off my cheeks , the only stay signifier of my identity beyond ward of the DoS was a tiny crescent - determine wound nestled in the crook of my elbow . It look like a track mark . They ’d peg me for a junky .
I was n’t a junkie . I was a 21 - year - old college junior who preferred ketamine hydrochloride to keg stands . And I had just become a casualty of the war on drugs .
A user is born
My infatuation with illicit substances was a former maturation . I ’d been a straitlaced kid whose after - school day activity go around around march stripe and study chemical group . That ’s partially because I was borderline nerdy and partly because my sis was the nonmigratory hellraiser , blasting Marilyn Manson and snorting meth before she was even in gamey school . She wore a safety pivot on her JNCO jeans so she could make pipes from Coke john on the fly .
I would n’t try drugs until I was 20 , working the golf shot shift at a Baton Rouge Marriott . One crystalline night in December , my carbon monoxide gas - worker Zane convinced me to come out with him . " Take , deplete , this is my soundbox , " he intoned as he promote a tab of ecstasy onto my tongue . Zane was super fond of Jesus and raves , and that nighttime , I would follow to sample both in the bitter flavour of MDMA . The scale fall from my oculus . I was a charwoman transformed . I was rolling . And drugs were splendid .
The honeymoon phase never lasts long
After that company , I had lots of instant friends . I did ecstasy at least every weekend and soon bestow cocaine , marijuana , meth ( good old meth ! ) , azotic oxide , opium , hydrocodone , salvia , mushroom , and LSD to the list , plus a veritable alphabet soup of research chemical . I was n’t above huff telecasting oral sex clean . It was all strictly recreational , though . I didn’tneeddrugs . I could quit if I require to . I just did n’t want to .
I was a fair sex transform . I was rolling . And drugs were magnificent .
It was mid - July when my friend Randy , his boyfriend , and I embarked on a route trip to Ville Platte , Louisiana , for a weekend - farseeing outdoor music fete that predict free tenting , Tiki - fire up trails , massage therapists , and mist tents . The car was somewhat well hot - boxed when we turned into the final stretch of road . I was contemplating whether to leave out my acid or wait until we were at the party when a fuzz pulled us over for speeding . But a maniacally barking German shepherd in the car hinted at a deeper agendum .
Jason Hoffman/Thrillist
Randy was check for possession with intent to distribute marijuana , possession of Schedule II amphetamines , possession of cocain ( it was actually ketamine ) , possession of LSD with intent to distribute , and ownership of paraphernalia . The cops found a tote suitcase with three LSD - soaked SweeTarts , which I ’d squirreled away for my own personal use . In a regular Columbo move , the officer look from the nursing bottle of silver glitter in my carryall to my sparkly cheeks and say I was under halt , too .
Randy and I rode in the back of the cop automobile in muteness as green sugarcane fields roll by . It would have been pretty if not for the bars , handcuffs , and police force radio static .
Time at St. Landry Parish Jail doesn’t look the same for everyone
Ville Platte is a lowly Ithiel Town , population about 7,400 , so Randy and I were housed at the same jail . Male inmates populate on the first floor and female yardbird lived on the second level . I gave my engagement information , surrendered my personal item , and deloused myself in a cold exhibitor while a heavyset female guard duty see , expressionless . Next , she looked up my butthole . It all seemed so surreal . Then again , I was still high .
She led me to my cubicle block . There , a series of two - bed cubicle open into a common area with tables , a remuneration phone , and a high - bestride TV . Most of the inmates were sitting on the floor , back up against the wall , observe TV . I was the star of my cell city block when I arrived . " What are you in for ? " they ’d ask , and then , when I told them , " Are you tripping correctly now ? "
We blend to a drugstore , bought cough - suppressant tablets , and robotripped in a motel syndicate , await to be arraigned .
Jason Hoffman/Thrillist
After eating a dinner of two dusty hot dogs , I endeavor to sleep . As I stared at a grated slit of windowpane from my slender credit card mattress , my cellie , who was black , evidence me her account . She ’d been picked up on a bench sanction for unpaid speed ticket and had expend the last three weeks in jailhouse . I wondered how I ’d fare if I were jail for that long , what would happen to my life alfresco . I ’d fail my summertime trend , suffer my two part - prison term jobs . I call up how unfair it was that I could literally purchase my exemption , when my cellmate could n’t .
And that ’s exactly what ended up happening . The next twenty-four hours , Randy ’s beau bailed me out on my parents ' credit card . wedge back into the jellylike Louisiana heat , I wanted nothing more than to be in high spirits . So we fail to a pharmacy , purchase coughing - suppressant tablets , and robotripped in a motel pool , wait to be arraigned .
The sentencing and aftermath
I was charged with possession of LSD , a felony . The judge offered me a deflection program . I had to complete rehab , 500 hours of community service of process , a twelvemonth of probation , and compensate some fee , and then my record would be expunged . All because I had money and a salutary attorney . I ’m going to go out on a limb here and say being a white person did n’t spite me either .
Let ’s compare that to my friend Carl , who was also fairly dynamic in the same rave scene . We were both arrested in summer 2001 in small Southern Louisiana towns ( Ville Platte and St. Francisville ) . We were both LSU students , eld 21 and 22 . Both nail for LSD – I was charge with possession and Carl was charged with willpower with intent to spread . We had a lot in vernacular .
Now here ’s what ’s different . Carl ’s a black Isle of Man and I ’m a white woman . purpose to distribute does channel more weight , but the very language of that lawleaves a lot to interpretation : If there are a bunch of drug , that ’s a factor , but so too are whether you have drug paraphernaIia , packaging materials , and so on .
I pass one night in jail . Carl spent three month . " They ’d fix my bond so high – $ 40,000 , " he think . " My parent did n’t have that kind of money . So I sat . "
My bail was $ 1,000 . When I went to sentencing , I had a good attorney courtesy of my white middle - class parents . " I had to accept a plea bargain because I did n’t have money for a lawyer , " Carl told me .
I was offer a diversion program . Carl was declare oneself probation for five years , and after that his felony was reduced to a misdemeanor , not expunged like mine was . In almost every way , I am a living example ofwhite exclusive right in the Justice Department system : black people are likely to receive higher bond quantity for the same law-breaking , more likely to receiveharsher sentences , and less potential to be offered diversion programme . And although I was a victim of the war on drugs , the warfare on drugs was never about imprisoning people like me .
Why the war on drugs is racist bullshit
By now , you believably know this former chorus . The war on drug start out in 1971 , when President Richard Nixon declared drug abuse " America ’s public enemy identification number one . " In a 1994interview , Nixon ’s domesticated affairs advisor , John Ehrlichman , say that the goal to excrete drug abuse was little more than a ruse : " The Nixon campaign in 1968 , and the Nixon White House after that , had two enemies : the antiwar left and black people … We knew we could n’t make it illegal to be either against the state of war or disastrous , but by aim the public to affiliate the flower child with marijuana and blacks with heroin , and then criminalizing both heavily , we could disrupt those communities . We could catch their leaders , raid their homes , break up their meetings , and vilify them night after night on the evening news show . Did we have it away we were lying about the drugs ? Of naturally we did . "
Nixon did n’t pull this idea from lean melodic line . In 1914 , aNew York Timesheadline read , " Negro Cocaine ' demon ' Are A New Southern Menace . " In the thirties , Harry Anslingerof the Federal Bureau of Narcotics continued to take advantage on racial discrimination so as to demonise marijuana . During the modernistic era , racism became more indirect , with thing like harshersentencing guidelinesfor wisecrack user ( who are mostly dark ) than for powdered cocaine users ( who are mostly white ) . The end consequence is that while white-hot hoi polloi aremore likely to abuse drugsthan people of color , black people are10 times more likelyto be sent to prison on drug arrest .
Although I was a victim of the warfare on drugs , the state of war on drugs was never about imprisoning the great unwashed like me .
" The unfair software of natural law was n’t a flaw in the war on drugs,“wrote Jarvis DeBerryinThe Times - Picayune . " The unfairness was the point . "
I could analyse the numbers to trust racism in the state of war on drugs live , or I could simply examine my own life . " You were at LSU , right ? " Carl asked me . " Now , when you were looking for something , was it more often from someone white or non - lily-white ? "
Often , my drug supplier was Carl ’s former roomie , an LSU scholar I ’d receive in rehab . A whitened guy wire .
Fifteen years and a felony drug charge later…
Now entering our late 30s , Carl and I both live in New Orleans . Carl work two service - industry jobs in the Gallic Quarter and graduated this calendar month with an fellow of apply skill in computer information and technology . I work for a local alt - hebdomadal and do freelance penning . The state of war on drugs , my arrest , and my subsequent stint in rehab did n’t instruct me that drugs are bad . I do n’t believe I was an addict , and I still smoke weed , booze , and eat the occasional mushroom cloud . It did , however , spread out my eyes to my unfair advantages in this world . As for Carl , he said the experience change him " a lot . " " I would like to live a life where that did n’t take place , " he enunciate . " But , as they say , you play the hand you ’re dealt . "
- name calling have been changed
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