With its arresting views , incredible cuisine , and pregnant political mood , you do n’t so much move to San Francisco as you enter a relationship with it . One that will commute you , gainsay you , and cost you a bunch of money . Anyone who ’s pass any time living in the 7x7 will separate you that loving San Francisco ai n’t always easy – but who enunciate core - judder relationships would be ?
I was born in San Francisco but was raised 30 minutes north starting at the eld of two . I ’ve live in a Nob Hill apartment for six and a half years , where I ’ve give split on both a freelance and tech salary . I ’m bloodless and by virtue of the very zip computer code I inherit , was born rounding third . That being said , moving to SF from anywhere can extract some serious feels and might be one of the more complex family relationship in your life .
The first stage: The Chase
At this degree in the game , you do n’t really make out San Francisco . But you know of it . How could you not ? SF straddles the line of being both in - demand and over - exposed – not unlike the Instagram - famous . We can scantily go a news program cycle without someone writing a trend piece about the 7x7 or one of its neighbour . And surely if the City was a material live single charwoman , she ’d have her Instagram fix to world feature many pictures of the luscious bender of her coastline ; possibly even with the hashtag # wokeuplikethis when she feelin ’ it . San Francisco is n’t just a flirt , it ’s a city of caption and myth , and if you ’re about to embark on a relationship with SF , it credibly embark on to make you long before you forgather its pretty shore .
What you ’re doing : on-line stalk . It ’s OK , there ’s literally no other way to find an apartment here .
The second stage: The Honeymoon Phase
Welcome to an grownup vacation spot . Dive right in – the water system is frigid but you do n’t even care – you ’re here ! Now that you ’ve come , you ’re in that dizzying , elate phase in which you ’re dying to pick up all ofSan Francisco ’s wondersand souse up everything it has to declare oneself fromdive barstohiking trails . You ’re love - drunk and more than a little hard drink addled .
What you ’re doing : Nightlife at every museum , making your way throughbucket lists , andthese 53 things(preferably before you turn 30 ) .
The third stage: Your First Fight
There comes a time in everyone ’s kinship with San Francisco when you see a side of it that makes you go “ meh . ”It ’s 50 degrees in July . There ’s a 45 - minutewait for brunch . UghMuni .
Whatever irks you about San Francisco , it ’s not inevitably a deal circuit breaker , but it ’s unquestionably that seemingly small matter that will continue a constant infliction in every subsequent trouble you have with this gamey - sustainment metropolis . Kind of like when you first name what scrap you ’ll have with your significant other until either you discover up or one of you die . Take a mystifying breather ; we ’ll get through it .
What you ’re doing : Probably talking about the weather . It ’s too chilly ; it ’s groggy on one niche but sunny on another ; even though you ’re hot now , you ’ll need a sweater after ; what ’s the shortest length you’re able to get to find Lord’s Day ?
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The fourth stage: The Netflix-and-Chill Zone
Even if San Francisco is n’t consummate , it ’s knockout to stay sick when it face this sound .
At this dot , you and SF have a good affair going . You have it off hersecrets– specially if they ’re bar - associate – and mundane you think about how prosperous you are to live in the best metropolis on solid ground ( at these 13 thing ) .
What you ’re doing : You may still be Facebook - RSVPing toactivity dateswith your boo , but San Francisco ’s quintessential craziness has rub off on you , mean you ’re just as often prefer to go to yourfavorite neighbourhood pizzaplace where you ’ll revelry in that topnotch - cozy SF - local flavour . If you ’re lucky , this stage will last a very long time , and if you ’re very , very lucky , you ’ll get to repay to it even after butting up against the City ’s impossible expected value and horrendous fights about money , gentrification , and weird masses on the bus .
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The fifth stage: Spicing It Up
You still be intimate San Francisco , but you ’re not rule out the periodic threesome action with Oakland . Or Alameda . Or Marin . Or Santa Cruz . In fact , you ’ve dwell here long enough to realize one of the adept thing about living in San Francisco is leaving the City to chit-chat its neighbor .
What you ’re doing : California road trip , near - SFweekend route trip-up , andday stumble . Every strong weekend is booked with trips to waterfalls , wine-coloured country , brewery , and even extra trip toeat oyster .
The sixth stage: The ‘Is the Juice Worth the Squeeze?’ Phase
You ’re more and more notice something you ’ve known all along : San Francisco has offspring . There ’s the impossibly gamey rents , the deficiency of diverseness , and a acculturation that often ply only to the ample elite . Muni still suck and it really has been thecoldest summertime . In other words , you feeltrapped by San Francisco ’s golden handcuffs .
Whether you may commend San Francisco before this late tech boom or came here because of it , this city , for better or worse , forces you to call for yourself the unvoiced question : can you make it work ? Will you make change ? Or will you observe helplessly as things alter around you ? Its relentless highs and first gear and extremes in everything from elevation to wealthiness statistical distribution forever implore the quintessential relationship worthiness question : Is the juice worth the squeeze ?
What you ’re doing : ransack Craigslist – this time for Oakland apartments .
Flickr/Giuseppe Milo
The seventh stage: Acceptance
There ’s some good tidings about this pregnant , deliciously nonadaptive kinship . If you’re able to make it work , there ’s no place more worth the effort . For all of its issues , SF has it going on – from the sweeping views ( seemingly aroundevery corner ) and the propinquity to nature . The culture is a never-ending country of gyration , against a background of account that remains protected and immortalized by those who think in the very idea of this lowly , but mighty metropolis .
I , too , have felt the weight of San Francisco ’s golden manacle , perhaps now more than ever – the sense that divulge up with it over its yield mean also depart everything I fell in love with behind too … perhaps forever . I do n’t know if I ’m ready for that sort of commitment . During my worst competitiveness with San Francisco , I recall that no matter how long it last , there ’s no deny this gorgeous place offer an affair to commemorate .
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