Chris Evans may see hunky - walleyed pike no affair where he falls on the beard - to - bare spectrum ; and Mark Ruffalo did wait a bit DILF - ish in that Bernie Sanders effort video . BUT ! beard , when up penny-pinching and personal , come with some black side effects .
My first run - in with scruff resulted in a scar on my chin , and my therapist ask if I had accrue . And I ’m not the only one : an informal poll of women found the majority share a distaste for the hazards of unshaved faces . certain , the decisiveness of whether to plane is up to a man and his thoughtfulness – but do n’t say we did n’t warn you .
Feel the (beard) burn
A good exfoliant does wonder . Brighter skin ! Fewer breakouts ! Smaller pores ! Keeps Sephora in business ! But unless his facial nucha is made from a mix of brownish bread and essential oils , it ’s more potential imparting redness , roseola , acne , and flake off on all the skin it derive in striking with : face , private parts , or otherwise . We may put up with the pain and modest humiliation of a Brazilian wax , but beard cut in the land down under ? Not so much .
A beard is like a mini fridge… on his face
That croissant he rust for breakfast ? possibly the halal he bribe for lunch on the run ? There ’s no need for food - tracking apps when grounds of every meal can be find within the hairy trappings of a human ’s face .
And let ’s be fairish here : judging from the amount of crumb that end up on my level after munching on a travelling bag of chip and the issue of coffee tree and salsa stains that have leave their mark on almost every sweatshirt I own , I too would be carrying around a tiny snackpack on my grimace if I sported a byssus . But just as I excuse myself as I fish a piece of rice out of my cleavage , so should valet take a few seconds to give their beards a quick shakeout military post - dinner .
Or , better yet , shave .
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Hair clippings in sinks are the worst
We applaud a humans who keeps his beard in deterrent with steady passementerie and congratulate – EXCEPT when the clippings are leave scattered around the bathroom like confetti after a hair - fetishist ’s New Year ’s party . Men , the next time yougive yourself a human face haircut , clean up after yourself so she does n’t find face pubes among the bristles in her toothbrush .
And to keep things adequate here , all you ladies who pass up to angle your whisker out of sink and shower drain are just as guilty . Just saying .
Beards look (and feel!) just. Like. Pubes.
Beards require a different kind of pulling out
You be intimate what stamp out the mood ? get hairsbreadth up your nose . Or in your mouth . Or feeling your Kuki and upper back talk go numb . Or any other mixed bag of impairment wrought by whiskery look . Having to stop kiss because a tiny furball is lodge in my throat , or because my font is being rubbed raw , is n’t my idea of a estimable time .
There’s a stranger in my house!
And lastly , there ’s a reasonableness why a whole genre of horror pic involve a menacing man entering an free cleaning woman ’s house in the center of the night . No judgments if you and your boyfriend are into intruder - touch on role - performing , of course !
Seeing your BF emerge from out of nowhere with an entirely hairless face – specially if you ’ve never seen him sans beard – can be downright terrifying . Remember guys : surprise can be fun ! But not when our life are flash before our eyes .
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