There are two case of suburbanite : those that typically live in far - flung suburbs and only confab the metropolis once or doubly per year , and those that forge and/or expend most of their detached time in the city , buthappento keep a suburban destination . If you fall into the 2d camp , then betting odds are , you ’ve probably been necessitate “ Why the heck do you live in the suburbs ? ” about 6,000 times by your city - home opposite number . You ’re probably also really , really sick of hearing the following comment .

“Oh, you’re from the suburbs? I can’t date you.”

If someone from the suburban area contacts you on a dating land site even though you clearly live in the city , chances are , they likely already assume that you do n’t have a car , and they whole assume that you ’re probably unwilling to trek out to the suburbs . In fact , betting odds are , they spend most of their gratis prison term in the city – hence why they ’re not looking for match in Evergreen Parkor wherever they happen to live . Then again , perhaps they just require to use you for a place to crash after a night out . You know … either / or .

“How will you get to work every day?”

There ’s nothing worse than interviewing for your dream line at a company Downtown , only to be rejected because the hiring manager acquire you wo n’t be able-bodied to find your direction to work every day . What are we , five years old ? Look , we realize that Rosemont , Oak Park , and Skokie may sound like far - off solid ground , but trust it or not , they still get CTA service . There ’s also this new thing call Metra , we get word it ’s really efficient ! Well , OK , until they of necessity halt table service for the fourth time in one month , anyway .

“Where do you even hang out?”

Well , in the first place at Streets of Woodfield because that ’s where all the really cool kid hang out . Afterwards , we adjoin the rest of our friends at Denny ’s . Of course , we always do glad hour at Friday ’s and Applebee ’s … when we ’re not in the city at theexact same places you frequent , of course . await , did you really think we were serious about that Streets of Woodfield thing ? Haha ! Sorry .

“You practically live in Indiana!”

We realize that you recently move to Chicago and therefore may not be conversant with local geography , but we assure you : Orland Park is definitely in Illinois , not Indiana .

“Ugh, those suburbanites… ”

Somehow , hoi polloi from the suburbsalways get blamed for every farcical thing that go down in neighborhoods like Wrigleyville , which , in case you have n’t noticed , is almost entirely populated by transplantation . So , unless you ’re referring to frat bros from the suburb of Ohio , I retrieve you ’re disordered . Now , if you ’re referring to the hordes of suburban moms barricade the entire pavement alfresco of American Girl Place , well , we wo n’t argue with you about that .

“Is gas cheaper by you?”

Yes , of course it is … kinda like our economic rent . And no , we will not stop at one of those “ No City Taxes ! ” cigarette stands by O’Hare to buy you a carton of butt before we hop on the Kennedy … we do n’t need to waste our incredibly cheap gas .

“So, was high school like a John Hughes movie?”

Well , sure –if you ’re from Winnetka . Of course , if you ’re from the far west suburb , it ’s more likeMean Girls . In fact , did you eff that at Barrington High School , they impel you to wear pink every Wednesday ? Anyway , I would n’t really know about such things – I ’m from Melrose Park , which is more like a dull instalment ofMob Wives Chicago . Now if you ’ll rationalize me , my admirer Duckie will be here any minute .

“Isn’t it boring out there?”

Nah … not when you spend most of your free time gossiping about your neighbors , test to decide who ’s cheating on their married person , and which house is most likely to be a drug lab , all while spying on the Dr. Werner Klopek of the neighborhood . Now get off my lawn !

“You’re not from Chicago!”

We ’re not even lead to openthatparticular can of worms – you guy cable can duke that out amongst yourselves .

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The Breakfast Club

The Breakfast Club|Universal Pictures

city boy

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Metra

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Roasted Beet & Quinoa Salad

Roasted Beet & Quinoa Salad|Houlihan’s Orland Park

Chicago no trespassing sign

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Chicago suburbs

David Kay/Shutterstock