Houston may be a booming city with one of the most various populations in the country , but that does n’t mean its resident are n’t susceptible to a act of uniformness . Live here long enough , and you ’ll find that all of us modernise the same habits , specially when it follow to the way we go out . Some are cool , some not so much . Either way , here ’s what you need to know before forging a wild-eyed relationship with one of us :

You’re absolutely chillin' with granny this weekend

Been date stamp a while ? trust you like Sunday services and folk time , because you ’re expend at least a portion of your football game watching days at your G / BF ’s parents house . Do n’t care , the games will be on and beer will be had .

We may not have any kids, but we do have a baby… our car

Do n’t be surprised when the apple of your heart treat his pickup truck as the most precious entity in his life . It will be cleaned more often than his flat , cared for more often than his strong-arm health , and talk about more often than his tactile sensation . Get used to it .

We’re super chill until the traffic hits

You may imagine your new spicy catch is angelical , that is until you sit in the rider seat . No doubt a local ’s honest colors will fly the second someone test to cut us off and all Scheol breaks unaffixed . A secure mental test of our genial health is to see how long it takes us to calm back down afterward .

Happy hour is more important than dinner

You may have to suppress your expectations for date dark , because glad minute is happening first and first . or else of Pinot grape and filet , believe more along the argument of BOGO Warren Earl Burger and half - Leontyne Price beers . Or 10 promethium pizza pie delivery after a disturbed streak hop sesh .

You’re 100% going to a couple’s brunch this weekend

You did n’t really plan on go for a nice Sunday good afternoon motorcycle ride , did you ? Your new conquest wants you to meet her bestie ’s newest subjugation over eggs Benny and bottomless mimosas , and she wants to do it NOW .

Where you reside is a significant factor in how hard we’ll try with you

Fact : thing are n’t going to work out if you live in Pearland and we experience in Midtown . Most significantly because why are you living in Pearland , but also because that thing we enounce about traffic to begin with .

We’re not country, but the cowboy boots will pop out on occasion

Though it ’s doubtful any Houstonian see themselves to be Southern , we ’re known to get down with some commonwealth - ish stuff . So whether you detest our cowhand boots or not , those baby will make an appearance every now and then . Those times include but are not limited to rodeo season and work dinners with out of town clients we take to Taste of Texas .

Don’t try to pick an argument with us

Your great mistake will be misidentify our kindness for weakness . Because once you do , we ’ll use every down dwelling house , dirty trick in the book until we ’re satisfied we ’ve won the debate . Sure it ’s not pretty , but it works .

There’s an infinity chance we’re running into our ex at some point

Houston may be a city of sprawl , but we are pretty hardcore about hanging around our respective ' hood . imply the same bar you frequent now were once frequented by your date and a lineup of questionable others in the yesteryear . Whatever , you ’re hotter .

You’re going on a yearly float trip with our friends

First of all , you should like this because tubing the Guadalupe , or even better , the Frio , is incredible . If for some reason you ’re not down to swim a river with a ice chest of beers draw up behind you , we ’re not sure why a Houstonian match to date you in the first place .

We’re accustomed to service being a bit slow

Out of towners may not be able to handle the wait for the margarita you understandably ordered 15 minutes ago , but the extra waiting time is already ingrained in your Houston spawn SO . That ’s why we always order the second marg before the first is done ( not because we ’re functioning dipsomaniac like you conceive ) .

You kinda have to be OK with a weapon in the house

OK , so not every single H - town dweller possess a gun . But given the fact that Texas has a high-pitched gun - ownership rate then the rest of the country , we ’re somewhat sure a bunch of us do . Ergo , do n’t be surprised when you open up your girl ’s nightstand draftsman to find a hopeful pinkish one sittin ’ pretty .

We’re going to suggest a date that revolves around beer

surprise that your last three Tinder connection indicate meeting at Karbach ? You should n’t be . First because they ’re roster of craft beer is pleasant-tasting AF and secondly because PRETZELS WITH BEER CHEESE .

We’re not over college and we’re not trying to be

Saturday are for college sports , and yes , we ’re still rocking our older fraternity / sorority tees . They do n’t get old , just like our making love for tailgating and ability to absolutely crush the flip cup tabular array .

We have a Whataburger addiction and it’s not going away

keep your breath when trying to convince us Shake Shack really is seriously move to alter our life . We ’re Orange & White , Fancy Ketchup , Honey Butter Chicken Biscuit ride - or - pop off . Also , we ’re break off there on the fashion to your coworker ’s engagement political party whether you care it or not .

That being said, we expect our dates to love all kinds of food

Remember that thing we said about Houstonians and diversity ? That means we want have a go to spot for pho , another one for curry , and at least five for tacos . We expect you to be down for all of it .

We may not actually be from Houston

We may say we ’re from Houston , but that either means we ’re from a ' burb we know you ’ve never discover of or we moved here 10 years ago and are therefore staking claim to the this city as our own . You may as well just say you ’re from here , too .

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Brooke Viggianois a Houston author who is but is n’t from Houston . Not sure what that means ? Find out by following her@BrookeViggiano .

Couple in cowboy boots

Lorraine Swanson/Shutterstock

grandma in hat

Unsplash/Pixabay

guy stuck on traffic

StockSnap/Pixabay

cowboy boots

Alexas_Fotos/Pixabay

tubing

Epidote/Shutterstock

texas football game

Flickr/robert thigpen