For this version ofElle Oh Elle , I ’ve enlisted the representative of Monika megacycle , a Portland DJ and editorialist . Monika is a trans cleaning lady , and she ’s here to explain how you could make the world a better position by remove transphobia from your life .
Although at long last impossible to measure on the dot , anew studysuggests that about 1.6 million Americans are transgender . Too often in the LGBT treatment , we focus on the LGB , and draw a blank about the T.
permit ’s broaden our discussion , to include all of our sexual practice - irrefutable brothers and sisters . It is perfectly all right to not yet be conversant with these terms – but as you attempt to better empathize the trans community , it helps to start by understanding some of the language . Here ’s your starter guide .
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Transgender
Transgender is an umbrella term used to draw a soul who does not discover specifically with their assign grammatical gender from birth . There ’s a large spectrum on this – not everyone fall into an entirely male or female category – have in mind the term includes a lot of gray arena .
Some people use the terminal figure " transgender " to let in drag queens and all sexuality nonconforming folks ; others do n’t . Some trans family line hate the condition ; others do n’t . “ Trans ” bridges some of that spread . " When in question , " Monika order , " just say ' trans . ' It ’s a baggage - free abbreviation , umbrella , and identity for a large percentage of the community – and wo n’t be read as offensive or rude . No one is gon na start a hashtag because you called me trans . "
Cisgender
Here ’s a unsubdivided fashion to infer what it means to be cisgender :
ELLE : I ’m a cisgender female person ; meaning I name with the gender assign to me at nascency . I was raised as a female , and I identify as such .
MONIKA : I ’m a trans adult female . I was assigned male at birth , and I ’m a woman . I ’m also a disk jockey and a writer . I ’m wicked hot – and you , dear reader , should process me like people .
FTM, MTF
FTM is an acronym for “ female - to - male person ” that refers to trans men who were assigned female person at birth . Conversely , MTF is " male - to - distaff " and refers to trans women assigned male at parentage . Some masses find oneself the terminus uncomfortable and do n’t wish to use it ; others prefer it . You should always ask before these acronyms to describe an individual .
But how do you take someone a question like this ?
" It ’s like ask any other personal question , " Monika say . " Do n’t sink the dud in the middle of discussingStranger Thingson Netflix . But if the topic come up and you are sputter to find the right wording in your forefront , it ’s o.k. to just involve : ' I ’m sorry , this might be ill-timed , but do you opt FTM or is there a respectable terminus ? ' Just use good legal opinion , be cultivated , and you ’ll be fine . Always better to ask ! "
LGBT, LGBQ, LGBTQA, TBLG
The above acronyms are used in reference to L ) lesbian , G ) gay , B ) bisexual , T ) transgender , Q ) queer , and A ) asexual or ally . But while we lump all these groups together into a individual acronym ( i.e. , " the LGBT community " ) , it ’s important to remember that each part of these acronym represent a specific personal identity . Trans is overlooked too often , even as stride are made among the gay , bisexual , and sapphic communities . But some of that is ( finally ! ) starting to tilt , ever so slowly .
" Trans folks have been at the front of the LGBTQ equality front from the start , " Monika says . " Trans women push on the front rail line of Stonewall and the Compton Cafeteria riots . As things get better for LGBQ folk , the T just seemed louder by comparison . Our stories , eventually , cut through the noise and it lead us to where we are now .
" An ' ally ' is what you call yourself when you use the right pronoun for your trans friend , or when you retweet Laverne Cox . However , being an friend is more than just a few action mechanism . Even if you do n’t know a trans person , you’re able to ally . ” Write an email to your nation and national political science official in accompaniment of work protections for trans folks , or talk to your class about the humanity of trans common people . you’re able to ally all over your crime syndicate .
Pronouns
Pronouns are the parts of oral communication we use to draw the gender of people , deary , and sometimes boats and cars ( if you ’re into that sort of thing ) . She , he , and – if you ’re non - binary , or genderqueer – they . If you do n’t roll in the hay someone ’s sexuality , it ’s really easy to just use “ their / they . ” Try it ! People do it with baby all the time .
" Your cat is licking their mitt . ”
" That person with farseeing fuzz is waiting for their cab . ”
" multitude do it all the time in worldwide , " Monika says . " Chicago vogue manual , Washington Post , and many other style guidebook recognize it as just plain utilitarian . I have a friend who does n’t like it for formal writing , but they ’re wrong . See what I did there ? "
Transition
It ’s sort of just like it sound . It ’s usually refer to the medical and/or social puberty experienced by trans folk . It ’s just like a young Ci ( non - trans ) boy “ transitions ” from boyhood to manhood during puberty . You might find out someone secern you that they transitioned when they were 16 , for good example . That would give you some approximation of their life-time experience .
Transphobia
" People often read this as ' fear of trans masses ' and sorta rightly so , given its etymological roots , " Monika says . " However , the way it ’s used is more than just the veneration or hate of trans masses . It ’s about the systemic and socially arbitrate way in which society abuse an intact class of people and how that impacts the way trans folks , and trans charwoman in peculiar , are treated . "
Intersex
" This has nothing to do with being trans , " Monika tell . " It ’s a generalizing medical term to key folk born with genetic , reproductive , and sexual anatomy differences that do n’t fit the usual definitions of male and female person . Some epicene person the great unwashed are trans , and others are n’t , but they are separate thing . "
Genderqueer
Genderqueer is a variety of catchall umbrella terminus often used to depict grammatical gender non - conforming and trans folks who do n’t feel like they outfit into the manful or female identity . Not everyone uses it , and some people name as genderqueer and a cleaning lady or a man . It ’s a mussy world , and language is often inadequate to line how folks feel .
Queer
In the same way some sex - positive people like myself refer to themselves as a adulteress , most unseasoned LGBTQ mass are well-chosen to call themselves “ queer ” in an effort to domesticate the connotation of the word .
" It ’s a terminus some LGBT folks forged out of an anti - gay slur , " Monika say . “ commonly only cite to sexuality , I like to apply it to depict my sexuality and not my gender . Some people , though , identify as queer rather than trans . [ But ] it can be very offensive to some people , especially gay hands of elder generations . ”
Cross-dresser
Everyone is a cross dresser and everyone is n’t . essentially it ’s all about societal context . cleaning lady wear suits all the clip now , but at a different clock time we might have called that cross - salad dressing .
Nowadays , people seem to employ it to only name to men who break article of clothing and make-up deemed too feminine for a man . It ’s a ridiculous term past its prime .
Gender identity
Gender personal identity is define as the personal experience of one ’s own sexuality . Which seems vague , but that ’s hunky-dory .
" Sometimes it [ gender individuality ] can experience less solid , " Monika says . " I do n’t just identify as Latina , I am Latina . I am a char . "
To cut through the discombobulation , just go with the gender an case-by-case identifies as . A person with a vagina who describe as a military man , is a man . A person with a phallus identifying as a adult female , is a woman .
Trans man
This is a catchall normally used for trans masses assigned female person at parentage who are man . Sometimes they have go away through – or are plan to go through – some aesculapian intervention to enhance their comfort with their bodies .
Sometimes , mass apply the terminal figure to refer to people who do n’t distinguish with humanness . These are individual suit .
Trans woman
See above . This usually refers to people assign male at parturition who are fair sex . " Trans women ” is also sometimes used as a term for all trans masses who were assigned male at birthing .
Tranny
For both U.S.A. of trans , is it o.k. to use the term “ tranny ” ?
" You ’re allowed to say any word , sure , " Monika says . " But it ’s probably ill - notify to skip down the street dropping the ' T ' all daytime . Not only are you likely to ruin someone ’s day , but you ’ll probably fathom like a clueless keepsake . So , unless you want to be a tosser , carry off on the ' tetraiodothyronine - Bible ' … unless you ’re a trans woman . It ’s sort of ' our word . ' ”
Same goes for “ transvestic . ” It ’s antediluvian , and should be result to the handwriting of theRocky Horror Picture Show .
“ Back in the ' XC , " Monika says , " there were these insufferably fine distinctions drawn between different types of transgender and gender - nonconforming common people . ' Transvestite ' was a diagnosing from theDSM IV code for mental illness– that has since been remove – used to describe folk who fetishize cross - grooming . If you identify as a man , and break intimate apparel while jerking off sounds like an ideal Sunday activity , then at that time you would have been debate a transvestic . These distinction have largely fallen out of use , or way , or whatever . No one is really using this term any longer . "
Sex , sex , and gender are a large ingredient to the formula of a society . And human rights are an entire part of an honorable nation – but it all take up with our ability to transmit with each other . Asking questions , express compassion , and seeking reason : this is how we elevate our culture to a better place .
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Whitney Streed is a Portland comic , you may find them on Twitter@whitneystreed