Dallas is grow rapidly , and with all these new the great unwashed moving to our urban center , we figured we would give them a handy guide to what they ’re gon na hear us say half the time and what those phrases really stand for . We may be a metropolis full of straight torpedo but sometimes you got ta understand between the line .
“Dallas drivers are pretty crazy, huh?”
displacement : “ Did you like thatMad Maxmovie because if so , why not live it every single Clarence Day on Woodall Rodgers or any of the 250 other highway in the metroplex on which the great unwashed enjoy repel 90 mph while texting and eating a sports stadium of pho all at the same prison term ? ”
“Hot enough for ya?”
interlingual rendition : “ We live in Dallas , where the temperature in August reaches spirit level that allows us to be able to cook a chicken knocker in the back hind end of our car . We all sleep with this and accept this but I ’m going to split up the awkward silence in this lift by making a pithy remark about how it ’s blistering outside . ”
“They’re almost done with the construction on 635.”
Translation : “ The never terminate route twist nightmare that is Dallas is become to get the belittled , almost unnoticeably turn better when they finish one small discussion section of the LBJ Freeway project which has no definitive end in sight and the finish of which no one actually screw . ”
“I remember when Lower Greenville was dangerous, not the place where Trader Joe’s is.”
Translation : “ I like to romanticize the daylight when underage dance nine and $ 1 hurler of Everclear lead-in to parking sight stabbings but I still am more than felicitous to be able to buy Cookie Butter in my pajamas at 10 pm on a Saturday night . ”
“How ‘bout them Cowboys?”
Translation : “ Why are we , as a city , swear with a football enfranchisement that is the laughing stock of the NFL , and why do we still pay ‘ bucket listing vacation ’ prices for tickets to go to that dumb stadium in the midriff of a cluster of pawn shop class in Arlington ? ”
“It was bound to happen but did you hear that there’s going to be aReal Housewives of Dallasthis year?”
Translation : “ We are the kind of metropolis that the foundation for shows like theReal Housewivesfranchise was built upon but sometimes I like to pretend otherwise . ”
“Dude, I’m totally buddies with Mark Cuban.”
Translation : “ I was at a bar once that Mark Cuban showed up to and I took a selfie near him and you could kind of see him in the very far corner of the picture and then I semi - coherently pitched him myShark Tankidea which he kindly listened to for 30 seconds , dab me on the back and then leave behind the stripe . ”
“I liked the old Deep Ellum better.”
Translation : “ Even though Deep Ellum is now fill with tree lined streets , copious parking and a full variety of live music venue , upscale eateries and legal community for grown ups , I really lose those days when you would model in traffic on Elm for an hr while lustful underaged kids talk out of Cafe Brazil and vomited on the side of your machine . ”
“I don’t go north of 635.”
rendering : “ I adjudicate to prove my dedication to the urban core lifestyle by pretending that a beltway is some Mason - Dixon line dividing those cultured multitude with good appreciation from the lobotomized suburb dwellers to the North . But my parent do populate up there and I grew up there and I go up there every other weekend and there ’s really some pretty coolheaded restaurants but I ca n’t blow my cover . ”
“I don’t even need a car in Dallas.”
interlingual rendition : “ My friend give me rides a lot . ”
“Did you know that Addison has more restaurants per capita than any other city in the United States?”
Translation : “ I consider every Olive Garden , Subway , and the cafe at the front of Sam ’s Club where you could get a slice of pizza and a soda for $ 1.50 in that statistic so it sounds way more impressive . ”
“Hey, wanna day trip to Ikea?”
Translation : “ Frisco is a weird , extraneous world to me but they have Swedish meatball and cheap furniture there so let ’s pretend like we are hold out on a strange journey to research removed polish and also eat something phone Lingonberry before we get back on the Tollway and get the nether region out of there . ”
“I’ve never been to a strip club.”
displacement : “ I ’ve never started off the dark intending to go to a strip golf club . But stuff happens , man ”
“I think the Trinity Toll Road might be a good idea.”
Translation : “ Hi , my name is Mayor Mike Rawlings and I really do think that you should give this whole Trinity Toll Road thing another chance . Sure , no one in town wants it and it has become a punchline but who wants some Pizza Hut voucher ? ”
“Maybe I’ll have one Mambo Taxi at Mi Cocina’s then get the rest of this shopping list taken care of.”
version : “ Who knows a good divorce lawyer ? ”
bless up herefor our daily New Orleans e-mail and be the first to get all the solid food / drink / fun in the Big Easy .
Amanda Cobrais the kind of Dallasite who say , " Netflix and chill " and actually just wants to watch Netflix and pall . Give her ideas of stuff to bestow to her queue on Twitter@amandacobra .
Creativa Images/Shutterstock (Edited)
Flickr/Chad Riley
Flickr/John McStravick
Flickr/Lindsay Attaway